Daring to speak laments
This month marks five years since covid rocked our world.
We all had so much taken away from us. To take care of each other and keep safe, we couldn’t give hugs or see the whole of each other’s faces. Standing next to someone who coughed or sneezed led us to take a step back and search in our pockets for hand sanitizer. We all had so many questions and fears about the present, and the future.
During those long months and days, my husband and I talked through what was happening with our children, and with our college students (when we gathered again). The whole time I couldn’t help but feel like there was something bigger missing. After awhile I realized I needed a gathering where people from all walks of life gathered to remember, light candles, and acknowledge the times we were living through. I longed to grieve in community.
I bring this up because our scripture this week for our Lenten reflection is Lamentations. I know, it’s not exactly prime reading material for most people. You likely haven’t heard a sermon on it. But, in these days leading up to Good Friday, there is beauty in the words of the prophet who looked out over the ruins of Jerusalem and knew he had to speak aloud the grief.
Full disclosure of what we’re reading about in Lamentations - Israel and then Jerusalem fell to the Babylonians in 587 BCE because the leaders and people of Israel continually chose to follow other gods and their own ways. Numerous prophets had tried to get the people to return to God. And the people would. For a time. But the changes never really stuck.
So, when the Babylonians came marching, God didn’t stand in their way. The invaders destroyed the Temple and they carried off the people.
I don’t talk about loss and death brought about by people’s decisions because this is a really slippery path. It has been used by some people to cause great pain for others. However because of our reading this week, we must acknowledge that some times we live with loss and death because of choices we or others make.
Regardless of the root of our grief, the truth is that all grief is hard. All grief hurts. And when we are grieving, we need others to sit with us.
This is where the writer of Lamentations is coming from. How the people of Israel got to where they were was important, and the author confronts that. But, more important was creating space for the collective grief of the people. The unthinkable has happened. The people of God have been scattered and are unable to gather in one place anymore. But they need a way to process it all and give voice to their pain and confusion. They need someone to speak to the pain. Which is why we are pausing here.
Rodin’s Hand of God shows Adam and Eve cradled in the hand of God. When someone is grieving, I pray they will know God’s hand holding them, his arms surrounding them.
If we were able to read Lamentations in Hebrew, we would find each of the chapters (except for chapter 5) is an acrostic, each line beginning with a letter of the alphabet. This is the writer’s attempt to bring order out of the chaos of suffering. Words can be hard to come up with when we are hurting. The right ones are elusive, or they are not truly big enough to express what we are feeling. Lamentations is one person’s attempt to take his own personal swirling emotions and experiences and invite others to join in the expression.
There is hope to be found in there.
But there is also a very real recognition of the present pain.
There is confirmation of God’s faithfulness and love.
But we aren’t allowed to let those overshadow the expressions of fears and questions.
In The Bible Project’s video on Lamentations, Tim Mackie says that “suffering in silence is just not a virtue in this book.”
And so I invite you to try something with me this week.
Scripture is full of laments, or prayers of grief, pain, or sorrow. But, if you’re like me, I’m sure how to begin writing my own lament. So, after searching around, I found some ideas and created a guide. The Writing Your Own Psalm of Lament breaks down the writing into steps which allows us to get thoughts down on paper before trying to put them in some kind of order. Although sometimes getting the words out is enough.
There is no “right way” to write a lament. This is your conversation with God. It is what you need it to be.
No one will be judging what you write. It won’t be put out there for anyone else to read, unless you choose to. It is simply an opportunity to try and give expression to what you hold inside.
Whether you choose to write your own or read through the words of others, may the hand of God surround you and hold you in these days.
Peace,
Denise
For no one is abandoned by the Lord forever.
Though he brings grief, he also shows compassion
because of the greatness of his unfailing love.
For he does not enjoy hurting people or causing them sorrow.
- Lamentations 3: 31-33
